Revising for Parallelism II
To revise for parallelism, make sure that the same grammatical form is used for a series of words, phrases, or clauses. In the first example sentence below, the parts of the series following the word
because are not parallel. The first two parts,
it was clumsy and
it was too long are both clauses. The third part,
due to its lack of clarity, is a phrase. The sentence has been revised in three ways. Which revision do you prefer?
Not parallel
|
I rewrote the sentence because it was clumsy, it was too long, and due to its lack of clarity.
|
Parallel
|
I rewrote the sentence because it was clumsy, it was too long, and it lacked clarity.
|
Parallel
|
I rewrote the sentence because of its clumsiness, its length, and its lack of clarity.
|
Parallel
|
I rewrote the sentence because it was clumsy, long, and unclear.
|
Also check for parallelism in sentences that contain pairs of correlative conjunctions, such as both . . . and, not only. . . but also, either . . . or, neither . . . nor, or whether . . . or. The sentence structure after the second correlative conjunction should be exactly parallel in form to the structure after the first correlative conjunction.
Not parallel
|
Both the ideas in a paper and presenting them are important.
|
Parallel
|
Both the ideas in a paper and their presentation are important.
|
Parallel
|
Both the ideas in a paper and the presentation of them are important.
|
